|This page contains material intended to be humorous. It should not be taken seriously or literally.|
The Wikipatch is a patch (similar to a nicotine patch) designed specifically for wikipediholics, to help them get off the hook while on a period of abstinence.
Wikipatch is made of:
- 32 kB plain text
- 2 spoons of wikisyntax
- 1 hint of partiality
- 2 glasses of NPOV
- 1 dose of trollism
- 1 link to the GFDL
There is also the Wikipatch Strong which adds to the previous list:
- 145 e-mails with broken encoding
- 12 IRC windows
- 1 new Wikimedia project
The wikipatch is attached to the side of a common house brick. Apply the wikipatch on the forehead for 15 seconds per dose.
- 1 to 2 times a month for anonymous users
- 3 to 4 times a week for logged in users
- 6 to 8 times a day for sysops
- 9 times a day for bureaucrats
- 10 to 15 times an hour for stewards
- 2 to 4 times a minute for board members
- 4 times a minute for Jimbo Wales
For use during more than 8 days, prefer the Wikipatch Strong.
Do not use for more than 15 days without referring to your phone company.
Wikipatch lets you put the children to bed in the evenings, pack (or unpack) boxes to move, blog, reply to personal e-mails and, more importantly, cook nice meals to share with other wikipediholics. It is also known to have improved marital relationships, specially in wikipediholic couples (if any).